Elder Scrolls – Sweetrolls

You know, I used to like Sweetrolls, but then I took an arrow to the leg, and couldn’t bake them anymore…

SURPRISE!

I’ve had this recipe kicking around behind the scenes for a little while, and suddenly, it just felt like the right time to share it. Maybe it’s because there’s a Monday looming in the not-too-distant future. Maybe it’s because there’s still snow in the forecast, and I just can handle it.

Or maybe it’s because these are just too good to not share.

These iconic little sweetrolls have become a staple within the world of Tamriel, and with good reason. They’re light, fluffy, and just dripping with that thick icing. The recipe might make four, but that doesn’t mean four servings by any stretch. Personally, I eat two, minimum. Non-negotiable.

So give these beauties a whirl, and let me know what you think. Also, check out my other Elder Scrolls recipes while you’re visiting The Inn, and stop by again soon. I’m always adding more.

Elder Scrolls Sweetrolls Recipe

Prep: 10 minutes Rising: 30 minutes Baking:15 minutes

Makes: 4 good sized rolls

Ingredients:

3/4 cup warm milk
2 Tbs. honey
Pinch of salt
2 tsp. dry active yeast
3 Tbs. butter
1 egg
1 ½ cups flour

For the Frosting:

2 Tbs. cream cheese, softened
1 Tbs. unsalted butter, softened
2 Tbs. heavy cream
1/2 cup powdered sugar

Preheat oven to 350F. Combine the warm milk and honey, stirring until the honey has dissolved. Add the salt and yeast, followed by the remaining ingredients. Mixing completely until you have a smooth batter. Spoon evenly into a 5” miniature bundt pan. Allow to rise for 30 minutes, then bake for 15 minutes.

While the rolls bake, make up the frosting by creaming together the cream cheese, butter, and powdered sugar. Gradually add just enough heavy cream to get a smooth, thick icing that barely runs off a spoon.

When the rolls are finished baking, allow to cool for 5 minutes in the pan, then tip out onto a cooling rack. When they are completely cooled, spoon the icing over the tops of the buns, letting it run down the sides a little.

Star Wars – Alderaan Twist

Alright, so here’s the first mockup of the Alderaan Twist. I like it well enough, but I think there’s still a good deal of room for improvement. Which is not to say I didn’t dutifully drink down the entire glass after getting the photo. ;)

I’d wanted to have a number of elements in the picture, like pop rocks on the rim, and a sparkler, and some better layers to represent that blue-green planet. AND a protocol droid to hold it, just like in that image. 501st, I’m looking at you…

This drink is reported to have been the favorite drink of Eneb Ray, an Alliance spy working for Princess Leia Organa on Coruscant. His mission was not a success, and one has to hope it wasn’t on account of this cocktail. The flavors are fun, albeit not quite the level of pizzazz I’d like. Orange, melon, and pear are familiar flavors to most of us, although they do meld into something a bit more unique when added together.

So expect an update on this one at some point, but in the meantime, Cheers!

Alderaan Twist Recipe

Location: Coruscant, and other bars throughout the galaxy

Makes 1 serving

Prep: 5 minutes

Components:

1 oz. blue curaçao
1/2 oz. midori
1/2 oz. lemon juice
champagne or sparkling pear cider
lemon twist to garnish

Pour the blue curacao into the bottom of a champagne flute. Combine the midori and the lemon juice in a small glass, then pour that into the flute as well. Top up with champagne, garnish. and serve.

Canon.

First appearance: Star Wars Annual I

Elder Scrolls – Honey Pudding

Thoughts:

I’ll admit it: I’m a honey addict. Seriously, I buy the stuff in bulk because those squeezy bottles just don’t last long enough in this house. I even have bees out back, and hopefully this summer will get to sample some of my very own honey, made from the flowers around our gardens.

I. Can’t. Wait.

So naturally when I saw this dish in the Elder Scrolls lineup, I jumped at the chance to make it. I mean, who doesn’t love pudding? And a HONEY pudding, to boot? Sign me up!

This dish, like so many Elder Scrolls recipes, didn’t disappoint. It’s thick and richly flavored, with all the nommy goodness of pure honey, but without being overpowering. It’s a great summertime picnic contribution, and reminds me of warm, sunny days spent out in the garden. The dark earth, gently bobbing flowers, and the steady hum of bees industriously working.

I’ll admit quite readily that although I shared this with family, I personally ate two out of the four servings, and felt no regret. It’s delish.

Be sure to check out my other Elder Scrolls recipes as well, and enjoy!

Honey Pudding Recipe

Prep: 10 minutes Cooking: 10 minutes Chilling: 1 hour

Makes: 4 servings

Ingredients

2 cups whole milk
1 whole vanilla bean, or 1 tsp. extract
1/4 cup white sugar
1/2 cup honey
1 cup heavy cream or whipping cream
3 Tbs. cornstarch
3 egg yolks
pinch salt

Pour the milk into a medium pot over medium heat. Split the vanilla bean down the middle with a sharp knife and scrape out the seeds. Add the seeds and the pod to the pot of milk, and bring to just under a boil. Add the sugar and honey, and stir for a few minutes to allow the vanilla to steep into the milk. Fish out the pod, scrape any remaining seeds from it, and discard.

In a separate bowl, whisk together the heavy cream, cornstarch, egg yolks, and salt. While still whisking, pour a little of the hot milk into the bowl to temper the mixture, then pour everything back into the pot. Cook for around 5 minutes more, stirring all the while, until the mixture has thickened noticeably. Remove from heat, strain into a clean bowl, and cover with plastic. Chill for at least an hour to help the pudding set.

Elder Scrolls – Honey Nut Treat

If you’ve ever played any of the Elder Scrolls games, chances are they’ve made you hungry. This is one of the top most requested recipe from the entire Elder Scrolls series, and because it’s usually something purchased in the game, one of the most tricky to figure out. I mean, this isn’t a whole lot to go on:

I started, as sometimes happens, by overthinking things. I envisioned these lumps of tender nougat, covered in caramel and rolled in nuts. It was inspired, but also a little ridiculous. Not to mention complicated! I ate a lot of nougat that never quite seized up, and decided to take a different approach to the problem.

When in doubt: simplify.

In the end, this recipe is easy to make and tasty to eat. They’re nutty, oaten, sweet little morsels made with ingredients that would be common enough in the world of Skyrim. While they’re great at home, I imagine they’d be just wonderful as a street food snack, for adults or children, especially in the frigid winters of Skyrim.

Be sure to check out all my other Elder Scrolls recipes. I’m adding more all the time, so be sure to stop by again soon!

Honey Nut Treat Recipe

Makes about 9 balls, or 3 skewers – Prep: 15 minutes

Note: you can sub in any nuts or nut butters you like in this recipe, and it’ll still be tasty. :)

Ingredients:

1 cup pitted dates
1/2 cup golden raisins
1 cup sliced almonds
1 cup rolled oats
1/4 cup honey
1/4 cup peanut butter
pinch of salt
pinch of cinnamon

Set out a clean plate. Pulse the dates and raisins in a food processor until there are no large pieces remaining. Add the almonds and oats and pulse a few more times to incorporate.

In a separate bowl, heat the honey and peanut butter until they are a little runny. Add the fruit and nut mixture, plus the salt and cinnamon, to the bowl and mix vigorously until you have a thick consistency. Scoop out small pieces of the mix, squash in between your hands, then roll into balls. Set on the plate. Repeat until everything is used up, then thread onto skewers.

The rougher your skewer, the better the treats will stick, I learned, but I didn’t quite have time to go out and whittle down a twig. If your treats start to slide, I suggest you just eat them a little quicker, or add a bit more oats. ;)

Star Wars – Polystarch Puffbread

I don’t know about you all, but I literally gasped out loud when I saw this scene from The Force Awakens for the first time:

Seriously, nothing beats practical effects, and a team apparently spent around three months (!) getting that effect just right. As far as I’m concerned, they nailed it, as it’s one of the most memorable parts of the film for me.

Some cool tidbits about this bread… The mixture comes from Unkar Plutt, who is profiting wildly off the remoteness of that trading station on Jakku. You have to figure that he obtained the ration packs for as little as possible, and because he also sells the water necessary for making it, he’s got a slice of all the profit to be made out of folks just trying to survive.

Life can be tough for a scavenger like Rey, especially on desert planets like Jakku and Tatooine. Where eating is more necessity than pleasure, one often lives hand to mouth, scraping by with traded salvage for rations such as these, which likely were themselves salvaged from military supplies:

This recipe, while not quite so aesthetically impressive as the film version, does puff up when made, in under a minute. The ingredients were selected for basic nutritional content rather than tastiness factor; Rey’s eating to survive. But let me tell you: if you imagine you’ve just come back from a long day of salvaging parts in the dry heat of Jakku, just about anything made of food will start to taste great!

Update: I’ve added this recipe to the lineup for Fictional Foodies’ May Star Wars lineup. Check out the other cool recipes folks have submitted here.

Polystarch Puffbread Recipe

Location: Jakku, and throughout the Galaxy

Makes: 1 small serving

Prep: 5 minutes – Cooking: 45 seconds

Ingredients

1/2 teaspoon vegetable oil
4 Tbs. wheat flour
1 Tbs. instant oats
1 tsp. sugar
1/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 tsp. thin flakes dry seaweed
pinch each of salt, ground pepper, cinnamon
~2 tablespoons water

Lightly grease a 6″ ramekin or small bowl with the oil. In a separate bowl, combine all the dry ingredients, followed by just enough water to hold it all together. Quickly form into a rough ball, and place in the center of the ramekin. Place the ramekin in the microwave, and cook for 45 seconds, during which time the bread should puff up somewhat. Allow to cool slightly before eating.

Elder Scrolls – Orcrest Garlic Apple Jelly

Today’s recipe, in celebration of a (finally) fixed blog, comes from Elder Scrolls Online, which has an absolute wealth of cool looking dishes.

Although Orcrest is widely known as a thriving black market city, its other more common offerings should not be overlooked. This flavorful jelly brings together two simple ingredients in a new and delicious way. It’s not technically contraband, but it’s so uniquely good it could be…

This makes an unusual but tasty spread that is as good on toast as it is as a sort of chutney stand-in on sandwiches. Both sweet and savory at the same time, it’s a treat for your taste buds. I might try oven roasting the garlic next time, but for now, this one’s a keeper.

Orcrest Garlic Apple Jelly

Ingredients

2 lb. cored and chopped semisweet apples, such as Fuji
4 heads garlic, broken apart
4 cups water
4 cups apple cider
2 cups sugar
pinch of rosemary or sage, optional

Instructions

Simmer everything but the sugar for around 20 minutes. Strain through a sieve, pressing to extract as much liquid as possible. Add the sugar, then boil for another 30 minutes or so, until the mixture is thickened. Gently pour into clean glass jars, and refrigerate for up to 3 weeks.

Northern Cheesy Oats

Thoughts:

Good Heavens.

Talk about the best side dish I’ve encountered all winter. It’s rich, creamy, and full of cheesy goodness. While it’s undeniably a hearty accompaniment to a main course, it is also absolutely amazing as breakfast on a day when one just needs a little extra oomph. And it’s gluten-free, and needs only a few ingredients.

The only downside? This recipe ostensibly makes enough for two large servings, but I could easily scarf it all down myself. Next time, we might need a giant crockpot version…

Where in Westeros?

Definitely up in the North. This is stick-to-your-ribs comfort food that will leave you feeling full and happy even in the chilliest weather. If the Night’s Watch sent samplers south, their recruitment rates might just spike.

Cheesy Oats Recipe

Ingredients:

3 cups beef stock
1 cup steel cut oats
2 oz. cubed ham (about 1/2 cup)
½ cup shredded cheddar cheese
salt and pepper to taste

Bring the stock to a boil in a large saucepan, and add the oats. Reduce the heat to medium low, add the ham, put the lid on, and cook for around 25 minutes.

Check on the oats- if they have not yet absorbed all of the stock and turned soft, continue to cook until they do/are. At that point, remove from heat and stir in the cheese. Add salt and pepper to taste. Enjoy, and dream of spring!

Star Wars – Rootleaf Stew

Alrighty, here’s the runner up from my Twitter poll, one of the most memorable dishes in that galaxy far, far away. Straight from the swamps of Dagobah, here’s the stew that made Luke Skywalker make this face:

BUT! Before you start to doubt too much, here’s something to keep in mind: Luke has spent almost his entire life on Tatooine, a desert planet that’s just about the opposite of humid, marshy Dagobah. The flavor profiles would likely be entirely different from one cuisine to the next, so while the stew might be wholly nourishing, the flavors would be new and strange.

This was a fun recipe to put together conceptually. I opted for ingredients that could feasibly be found in murky, swampy areas: mushrooms, roots, bark, and large leafy greens. A favorite recipe of Jedi Master Yoda, and if you give it a chance, you might just wind up liking it too. And, because it’s quick to make, it is ideal for dinner guests who drop in unexpectedly.

Update: I’ve added this recipe to the lineup for Fictional Foodies’ May Star Wars lineup. Check out the other cool recipes folks have submitted here.

Rootleaf Stew Recipe

Makes 4 servings

Prep: 5 minutes Cooking: 20 minutes

Location: Dagobah, Outer Rim Territories

Ingredients

8 oz mushrooms, sliced
2 Tbs. cooking oil
1 Tbs. garlic, finely minced
1 Tbs. freshly grated ginger root
1/2 tsp. each ground cumin, turmeric, cinnamon
2 cups chopped roots, such as potato, carrot, parsnip, etc.
2 cups vegetable broth
several handfuls collard greens, torn small

Heat half the oil in a saucepan over medium heat and cook the mushrooms for several minutes, until they have released their juices. Move the mushrooms to a bowl and set aside.

Add the rest of the oil, followed by the ginger and ground spices, stirring for about 30 seconds until they are fragrant. Pour in the vegetable broth, followed by the root vegetables. Add water to just cover the roots, and simmer until they are soft, around 10-15 minutes, depending on their size. Add the mushrooms back in, followed by the collard greens. Cook for another minute or two, then scoop into serving bowls.

Elder Scrolls – Kwama Egg Quiche

You voted, and I cooked!

In my (relatively) recent Twitter poll, I asked which of several fictional worlds had recipes that you’d like to make in real life. We got a good response and with many more folks weighing in on Facebook, the clear winner was Elder Scrolls, with Star Wars not too far behind. I’ve got some Star Wars recipes coming up as well, because I just couldn’t help myself, but in the meantime, here’s the first of the Elder Scrolls recipes!

Now I have to preface this by confessing that I’m generally not a quiche person. It’s something about the texture, and with the occasional addition of wilted spinach or some other leafy green, I just can’t do it. This one, though, was pretty darn tasty, and for the first time probably in my life, I had a second helping of quiche. And as an added bonus, the ingredients are all from an in-game recipe that can be found in Elder Scrolls Online. Here’s hoping this is the first of many successful and tasty dishes from Tamriel – check out the list of other contenders on the new ES page!

Kwama Egg Quiche

Ingredients

1 cup flour
pinch of salt
1/4 cup olive oil
cold water, enough for dough
1 Tbs. salted butter
1-2 cloves garlic, minced
2 medium tomatoes, 1 chopped, 2 sliced, divided
one medium kwama egg, or 4 chicken eggs
1/2 cup milk
1 cup grated cheddar cheese
1/2 cup parmesan cheese
1/2 tsp. salt

Directions

Start off by making up the dough- Whisk the salt and olive oil into the flour, then gradually add just enough water to bring the mixture together.

Preheat the oven to 350F. Roll out the pie dough to about 1/8″ thickness, and gently drape over a tart or pie pan. Press into the bottom and sides, and trim off any excess. Prick the bottom of the pastry with a fork to prevent it from bubbling up.

Melt the butter in medium skillet over medium heat. Add the garlic and cook for several minutes, until slightly browned. Add the tomatoes and cook for another few minutes, until the tomatoes are soft, but not yet falling apart.

In a separate bowl, whisk together the eggs, milk, cheese and salt. Pour this mixture into the pastry shell, then top evenly with the tomatoes. Bake for about an hour, or until the top is golden and puffy. Allow to cool for 10 minutes before slicing.

Panforte

Bartolomeo Scappi strikes again!

I recently queried you all on Facebook about your favorite traditional holiday cookies and sweets. One of the most intriguing of those suggestions was for “Panforte”, an Italian confection that struck me as super medieval in origin. And for the first time in a long while, I summoned the oomph to do a modern and historical recipe comparison. I didn’t find an exact corollary, but I found a recipe in Scappi that looked to have similar ingredients, and tried that.

While the list of ingredients is similar, the two dishes are quite different. The panforte, which I’ll admit I’ve never had before, is really dense, packed with all sorts of nuts and preserved fruits. It’s an ideal superfood for long travel, as it stays pretty much the same after baking.

The historical recipe? ZOMG. It’s like a proto-mince pie in flavor, with more texture than the usual smooth consistency added by the almonds. My husband is a consummate Anglophile, and he thinks he likes it even better than mince. When warm, the filling is gooey, slowly oozing out of the crust, and it might just be my new favorite winter recipe…

Where in Westeros?

I could definitely see this being made in King’s Landing, and exported to different regions of Westeros, as the various ingredients would be easier to come by in the big trading hub city. It would likely be a special dish, perhaps connected to a holiday from the Faith of the Seven.

The recipe likely originally came from across the Narrow Sea, and traveled with traders. I expect it’s a new dish in King’s Landing, but one that will take the city by storm.

Cinnamon Tourte Recipe, 1577

“To prepare a cinnamon tourte, or some other sort. Get a pound of milanese almonds and grind them with a pound of sugar, two ounces of Neapolitan mostaccioli, three ounces of pinenut paste, one ounce of cinnamon, four ounces of clarified honey, two ounces of dried peaches that have steeped, and two ounces of candied orange peel. When everything has been ground up in a mortar, add in a beaker of rosewater to make the mixture thinner. Then have a tourte pan ready, lined with a rather thick sheet of dough make of fine flour, salt, oil, pinenut milk and sugar; put the filling into it. That tourte should not be too deep. Cover it over with another sheet of dough worked in any of a variety of ways. Bake it with a low heat, giving it a glazing of sugar and rosewater. Serve it hot or cold as you like. In the same way you can make a marzipaned tourte made of ground almonds, sugar and rosewater; or else marzipan paste. You can also make a tourte that same way with various candied fruits mixed with the marzipan paste and pinenut paste ground up with them. And for a tourte that you want to have a slightly roasted flavor, put in orange juice or verjuice.” -The Opera of Bartolomeo Scappi, 1577

Ingredients for dough:

2 1/2 cups flour
1/4 cup sugar
1/2 cup olive oil
1/4-1/2 cup almond milk

Ingredients for filling:

1 1/2 cups sliced or slivered almonds
1 cup sugar
1/4 cup cookie crumbs
1 Tbs. cinnamon
1/4 cup dried peaches, or apricots, diced
1/4 cup candied orange peel, diced
1/2 cup warmed honey
dash each rosewater and orange juice

Begin by making the dough – combine the flour and sugar, then work in the olive oil, followed by as much almond milk as it takes to bring the mixture together into a cohesive, workable dough. Form into two discs, then wrap in plastic and set aside.

To make the filling, combine the almonds, sugar, cookie crumbs, and cinnamon in a food processor. Blitz everything until you have a nice even mixture of coarse nuts and sugar. Add in the diced fruit, then stir in the warmed honey. Add a dash each of rosewater and orange juice.

Preheat the oven to 325F. Roll out half of the dough and lay in a pie pan. Scoop the filling into the pan, then roll out the other half of dough and lay over top. Trim off any excess, then crimp the edges closed. Bake for around 45 minutes, or until the dough seems cooked through. Allow to cool somewhat before slicing, as the filling is is quite runny when hot.

Modern Panforte Recipe

Ingredients:

Butter for greasing the pan
3/4 cup unbleached all-purpose flour
pinch of salt
1 tsp. ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp. each ground ginger and coriander
1/4 tsp. each ground mace and cloves
1 cup almonds
1/2 cup each toasted hazelnuts and walnuts
1/2 cup each dried apricots, dried figs, golden raisins, dark raisins
3/4 cup dried cherries
1/4 cup candied orange peel
3/4 cup sugar
3/4 cup honey
1/4 cup water
1/4 cup white wine (brandy?)
Confectioners’ sugar for dusting

Preheat the oven to 300F, then butter a round 8″ pan (springform will make this the easiest) and line the bottom with a disc of parchment paper. Butter the parchment paper as well, and set aside.

Roughly chop all the nuts and move them to a large bowl. Add in the dry ingredients and toss until evenly mixed. In a small saucepan, combine the sugar, honey, water, and wine over medium heat, stirring until dissolved. Add the dried fruit and allow to cook for around 10 minutes, until the fruit has absorbed some of the liquid. Pour this mixture into the dry ingredients, and stir vigorously, until the entire batter is mixed evenly.

Carefully pour the mix into the prepared pan, pressing down to make sure there are no gaps. Bake for about an hour, until the panforte is browned and a little puffy.

Either serve warm, or allow to sit for a few days for the flavors to develop. Cut into thin slices, and serve with tea or coffee. It should keep, wrapped, in a cool area for up to a month. Dust with powdered sugar before serving.

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